I have changed

Written by Michele DeVille a Grief Specialist

Deep and profound loss changes everything. Nothing looks or feels the same and it can leave you feeling untethered from life and lost in the middle of a sea of grief.

Life after loss feels overwhelming and unsettling and it's no wonder people afraid and alone. There's an element of desperation that comes with a devastating loss. A desperation to hang on to anything that looks familiar and can somehow keep you above the surface of life. Anything that can keep you from drowning and stay afloat.

It's really hard. And, I mean hard in ways that are difficult to comprehend until you have personally walked through the fires of loss and grief.

There's no easy way through the maze after loss, and especially when everything has changed within you and around you.

It can take a very long time to feel like you belong in the world again. To feel like you can catch back up to a world that kept moving long after your world came to a stop. And even then, life and the world you are trying to exist in won't always feel comfortable or make sense.

That's life after loss and that's life while carrying the heavy weight of grief.

I wish I could tell you there's a clear path to follow and one that is filled with guideposts to direct you along the way. I wish I could hold your hand when you are feeling lost and need someone to comfort you when you feel alone.

The journey of grief is personal and no one can do the hard work of grief for you. However, there's so much healing through connecting with others who have felt the burn of loss and grief on their soul. Others who get it and personally know how much it hurts.

Don't be afraid to reach out and towards the light of a community that comes together with a shared understanding of loss, grief and love.

While everyone's journey is different, connecting with others who get it can be an emotional life raft when you need it the most.

And, you can be a guiding light for someone else who is feeling lost and alone. Sometimes, one of the best gifts of healing, is when you can help someone else.

You're loved and you are love. Never forget that.

Michele